Some kind of Nervous
ADiv groupings are out, and my heart is beating kind of fast as i type. Inhale, exhale, lub & dub. The Heart was one of my favourite Bio topics, considering Bio was never one of my favourite subjects.
I've been in this constant worrying mode recently. I worry about assignments not being able to be handed up on time, i worry about what kind of spontaneous reaction i would give during training once i'm on the brink of giving up and probably start to sulk or complain and not do anything constructive at all but keep talking nonsense just to keep my worries away, i worry about falling asleep in class because sleep is something i'm so deprived of that i get so cranky even more often than before. I worry about myself being too annoying because i've been talking a lot more nonsense now that my brain is not getting adequate oxygen and i rarely process my thoughts before i verbalise it. i worry about my future because i want to get away and go overseas and study if i am given the opportunity to, and in order to be offered the opportunity, i got to work for it, and i need to work for it! So how am i going to work for it! What am i going to do? And i must also make sure at the same time i can cope with my work and CCA and still have time to enjoy the qualitative aspects of life! I worry so much that even when i am trying to catch my Z(s), i can't! Because a stressful mind is a restless mind! Gosh and golly. No matter how confident i appear to be, i doubt myself a lot, and i have all these little internal conflicts arising within me. It's just a really bad habit, i fret over everything because i seek confort when being in control of my life, and i am perfectionistic in nature. Its either i do homework well, or i simply don't do at all.
& i don't know why did i just time-wasted and spent a whole 10 minutes sitting in front of my laptop, typing and backspacing, typing and backspacing and worrying if i made a typo somewhere which i always do and people laughing at my spelling inaptness. Look, worrying over insignificant issues and making life difficult for myself once more. I think i need to come to terms with the notion that to err is human. (yea and to forgive is not) *slaps myself* OMGOSH BEIXI YOU'RE HUMANNNN. NOW WOULD YOU STOP BLABBING AND GO BACK TO DOING HOMEWORK!!?!?!
Someone save me from this perpetual fretting. ):
I've been in this constant worrying mode recently. I worry about assignments not being able to be handed up on time, i worry about what kind of spontaneous reaction i would give during training once i'm on the brink of giving up and probably start to sulk or complain and not do anything constructive at all but keep talking nonsense just to keep my worries away, i worry about falling asleep in class because sleep is something i'm so deprived of that i get so cranky even more often than before. I worry about myself being too annoying because i've been talking a lot more nonsense now that my brain is not getting adequate oxygen and i rarely process my thoughts before i verbalise it. i worry about my future because i want to get away and go overseas and study if i am given the opportunity to, and in order to be offered the opportunity, i got to work for it, and i need to work for it! So how am i going to work for it! What am i going to do? And i must also make sure at the same time i can cope with my work and CCA and still have time to enjoy the qualitative aspects of life! I worry so much that even when i am trying to catch my Z(s), i can't! Because a stressful mind is a restless mind! Gosh and golly. No matter how confident i appear to be, i doubt myself a lot, and i have all these little internal conflicts arising within me. It's just a really bad habit, i fret over everything because i seek confort when being in control of my life, and i am perfectionistic in nature. Its either i do homework well, or i simply don't do at all.
& i don't know why did i just time-wasted and spent a whole 10 minutes sitting in front of my laptop, typing and backspacing, typing and backspacing and worrying if i made a typo somewhere which i always do and people laughing at my spelling inaptness. Look, worrying over insignificant issues and making life difficult for myself once more. I think i need to come to terms with the notion that to err is human. (yea and to forgive is not) *slaps myself* OMGOSH BEIXI YOU'RE HUMANNNN. NOW WOULD YOU STOP BLABBING AND GO BACK TO DOING HOMEWORK!!?!?!
Someone save me from this perpetual fretting. ):
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